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You and Your Wills
by Nikki Willhite
Nobody likes to think about their own death, or think about a
time when they may lose control in making decision about their own life.
However, death is inevitable, and if you don't plan for it, you
will lose control of how your assets are dispersed.
If you care about your loved ones, you must make a will. Bear in
mind that if you have young children, if you don't have a will, their future is
decided by the laws of the state in which you reside. That includes both their
guardian and who handles their assets.
The other type of will that you need is a living will. A living
will is important if you become incapacitated. It lets the health care
professionals know your wishes.
As part of your living will you should also have a "proxy" that
appoints someone to make health care decisions for you if you can't do it.
No one likes to think about losing their health to the point that
they are no longer able to make decisions regarding their own care. While this
one is not inevitable, it does happen. If you live long enough, you probably
will eventually have to hand over control of many parts of your life to other
people.
I heard a saying the other day. "You start your life in diapers,
and you end your life in diapers." That's pretty hard, but the sad fact is that
our bodies and minds do deteriorate as we get older unless we are very lucky.
It is so unfair to your loved ones to die without a will.
Families are often torn apart fighting for money or property that they think
belongs to them.
Worse case scenario is that you end up in court fighting over
either property or life and death decisions. You waste your time, your
money, and you become emotionally exhausted and perhaps broken hearted.
The things you have worked for all your life may end up in the
hands of someone you really did not want to have them, such as an ex-spouse
because of an old will.
It is also very difficult, should you become incapacitated, for
your family to have to make decision about your health care if you have not
written them down. Even if they know your wishes, they have to deal with other
family members who may doubt why they are doing things.
Judging from the number of people who do not have these documents
in place, this kind of planning is not very popular. When bad things happen, it
makes it easier for everyone to deal with them if you have made the proper
preparations.
HERE ARE SOME OF THE THINGS TO INCLUDE IN YOUR WILLS
- If you have children, choose a guardian for them as well as
your wishes as to how their money should be handled.
- The power of attorney to your spouse so they can manage your
affairs if you can't do it.
- An executor to look after your estate.
- A list of personal possessions that you want to go to someone
special.
I've seen cases where family gets together after the death of a
loved one. Most family members are so upset, material things are the last thing
on their mind. However, there always seems to be one person who has come with
boxes and giant hefty bags to scoop up everything they can get their hands on.
- If you are married, and your spouse is not on the deed to your
home, which is often the case with a second marriage, give your spouse the right
to stay in the home as long as they need to do so.
There is nothing worse than being thrown out of your home when
you are grieving. It can take time to be able to emotionally leave the place
where you have been together.
Your children may be anxious to sell the home and receive the
funds, but they need to know that out of respect for your wife they have to
wait.
You are not being a "control freak" having a will and living
will. You are showing love and concern for your family. Find a lawyer, or do it
yourself. The important thing is to just do it.
Let your family know that you have executed both a will and a
living will, and where to locate the documents. This is just another step
in simple, responsible living.
About the Author: Nikki Willhite,
mother of 3 and an interior design graduate, has been writing and publishing
articles on the topic of
frugal living for over a
decade. Visit her at
www.frugalhappyfamilies.com
- where you will find hundreds of frugal living tips and articles. Frugal
Happy Families- more than just money!
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